Mental Poop

Friday, August 30, 2002

My mom reads the front page of my site. No matter what I put there, I think, she'll find something wrong with it. She didn't get the South Park reference, she didn't get the Real Genius joke... cripes. I cannot win. Perhaps I shall have to put happy flowers and dancing leprechauns and make it G-rated for Disney and all those impressionable young kiddies that see my site, the way they made Serving Sara so damn bland. They had to stop just short. Damn The Man, man. Damn The Man.

Achewood is so very wrong.

From the good folks at Penny Arcade: a Shockwave thingy that translates webpages into music. Well, not music so much as sounds kind of like that weird thing they used in that movie... you get your hands near it, and it makes noises...? Buggery.

"I'll take 'The Rapists' for five hundred."
"That's 'Therapists', Mr. Connery."

Beckett's was interesting. Alex was getting his groove on somehow - for one, he wore nice pants, and he also pulled two hot chicks onto the dance floor and waltzed VERY nicely with them. It was kinda cute, watching Alex mack on chicks. Then there was the scarily excellent retro 80s dancing after the live music stopped; seriously, that boy spent a LOT of time practicing that stuff as a youngin'.

Will's done several stripteases in his life. Like, enough such that he knows what to wear and what music to prepare.

This is somehow both intruiging and disturbing.

No, I take that back. What was moreso both of those was Jennifer's interest in it. Sorry, darling. :)

UGH. School is in, like, 5 days or something. Ugh.

Thursday, August 29, 2002
From Fametracker :: The Farmer's Almanac of Celebrity Worth:
The U.S. Senate - Fred Thompson is returning to his roots as an actor, replacing Dianne Wiest as the D.A. on Law & Order.

If this is true, FUCK YEAH.

The signature on Fox Mulder's badge in The X-Files has the handwriting of, like, my grandmother. It's lame.

School starts on the 3rd of September. I'm kind of looking forward to it, so I'll have something to do. Then again, it's, like, thinking. Eeww.

What the hell is Mulder doing back? Before the baby's born? Is it the real Mulder? Why am I caring?

Orpheus went down into the Underworld to rescue his beloved, but he turned to look at her before they left (something he was forbidden to do) and so she was swallowed up again by the Dead. I think her name was Eurydices. I think he was also carved up by a bunch of really pissed-off wives for some reason (or maybe that was a sole surviving soldier from a battle), and so his bodiless head kept singing.

I mention this only because Orpheus was part of a name for an oil platform on the X-Files, and so that I can easily reference the story should someone go "Hey, who's that Orpheus guy, anyway?".

Because that happens so often.

It came.

My big, long, piece of Peter Wingfield lovin' came.

Holy moly, kids.

Wednesday, August 28, 2002
Guess The TV Show or Movie Name - holy shit, just click there. It's that goddamned movie!

Granted, it's not the movie I was thinking of, but the question before it was "An 80s movie starring James Spader involving a gang?" and I had to click yes, even though I was thinking of Jawbreaker.

Which I haven't gotten from this guesser yet.

GODDAMMIT! I just had an epiphany, and I was going to blog it, and now I've fucking forgotten it! FUCK.

Oh, right.

Here it is!

I always get Charles Manson and Charles Bronson mixed up.

Ok, so it wasn't an epiphany. But it bugs me.

Tuesday, August 27, 2002
So, yeah, who decided that you actually had to ask to not have ketchup on the Ultimate Cheeseburger? I've been eating that thing for years, and the other day was the first time they put ketchup on the thing. Eew.

I reallyreallyreally enjoy THIS, as it is fun and like paper dolls, only without the mess and possible deterioration of the clothes and doll.

Ok, time for a silly irc rpg Star Wars/Star Trek thing. Good lord.

Monday, August 26, 2002
I've got tickets to the Tom Petty show this weekend. I have no idea what I'm going to do with them - Tom Petty's good and all, but it's not like, Oooo, Tom Petty!

"Is he sleeping?"
"No, Frank, he heard so much about rigor mortis he decided to try it."

I am still tired. Ugh. Oh! The dinner went fairly well; my sister and brother were a riot, and the food wasn't too bad to boot. El Cousin didn't talk much, so that was a blessing. Everyone got on very nicely, thank you. The cannoli was too hard, though.

Sunday, August 25, 2002
The 80s party at Rachel's was funfunfun. We watched Real Genius, Heathers, Better Off Dead, and Tuff Turf. I'd never seen #2 or #4. Heathers is just weird. Honestly. A messed-up movie with silly humor, especially at the end. Tuff Turf is an excuse to put James Spader in a black leather jacket, tight jeans, and Sun-In-ed hair. And tighty-whities.

Pardon me for a moment. Crappy movie, killer body.


Dad gave me some rolls of wrapping paper. He's moving down the cell block, so to speak, so I got to help him out. I banged my elbow several times, such that I was sad (especially in light of the lack of blood-sugar whatever). So, yeah. But it alllll worked out in the end.

I was going to tell you a funny story, but I don't know if Mom still reads this or what, so you're just going to have to ask me. It involves a futon and four people. And silliness. Sort of.

Saturday, August 24, 2002
I haven't posted much, as I have been very busy. Sue me.

Connection for icq is being slow, so convo is going poorly. I think I'll blame it on someone else.

Ok, time for shower.

Wednesday, August 21, 2002
Guess The TV Show or Movie Name - a FUN game, dammit. I'm up right now playing it, and no end is in sight. Sad.

Good god this is too damn fun. Just make sure you've got IE going, as that lets you move pictures.

Tuesday, August 20, 2002
Ok, so I have a cell phone. I got it over a year and a half ago, and it's been fairly fun and handy so far. I don't use it much, and I try NEVER to use it while driving. I also do my best to pay the damn thing on time.

Now, I rarely get the mail. Mom usually does that on her way home from work.

She comes down today, and says, "Oh, I don't think you saw this. I don't remember when it came in."

It was my phone bill.

Billing date? July 22.

Due date? August 17.

And she's blase about it. Says it's no big deal.

I am PISSED. I HATE paying things late. It's not good. And then she gets all loud at me for being ticked about it.

And some wonder why I hate people.

This is most pleasing: Open Letter to America from a Canadian.

"Watchmen" is an odd comic. Very good, yes. Odd, you betcha.

Joe Perry from Aerosmith is hot. But he's no Peter Wingfield.

Good golly, I've been remiss in blogging, or whathaveyou.

Mom saw the front page yesterday, and was offended somewhat by the reference to South Park. Granted, the main reason for this was because she didn't catch it.

Then again, it appears that she emptied my trash can, so I cannot complain overmuch.

Before I forget to mention this: Go rent Idle Hands. It was a silly movie, and while I haven't seen it too recently, I feel the need to shove it upon you. Yes, you, you in the back. I can see you. Stop picking your nose in front of people, dammit!

It is time for shower and bed. Hopefully, the weather will remember that it is still August, and not December, and will become at least tolerably tepid (as opposed to the chill wind and little sun of today (Monday)).

Sunday, August 18, 2002
I adore that Dell guy. He's fucking hysterical.


I played Grand Theft Auto III this weekend. I must say, I suck at that game. The controller is unwieldy, the whole multi-finger steering thing is awkward, and you can't fucking swim.

A hardened criminal, and he can't even swim. What the...

Friday, August 16, 2002
Why do school books have to cost upwards of $300?

I mean, honestly.

Thursday, August 15, 2002
I get to go pick up my niece now. Joy of joys.

Play Zer Cliff Game before I beat you up. Unless you've already played it. In which case, well, um.

Why does Star 101.3 play the Magnum PI theme when they start up the 80s at Noon segment? Granted, it's a good theme...

Speaking of themes, the full theme to Law&Order is GREAT. It's like, 3 minutes long, and funky, sorta.

I want this almost so badly, it hurts.

Well, and a few other things, but yeah.

It fucking HURTS.

Wednesday, August 14, 2002
What is this fascination TNT seems to have with Rene Russo? They've got her in Major League, Outbreak, Tin Cup, and some movie with the other Belushi and Linda Hamilton. She ain't that great, folks. Oh, and let's not forget The Thomas Crowne Affair. What the hell.

My mom really likes the White Chocolate Ginger ice cream. I think she's taken it upstairs for good; hopefully, she won't eat it all in one sitting, as it's got, like, 18% butterfat or something. That stuff'll kill you.

I think I'm gonna work on a new couple of quiz result pages. They take a while to load on dial-up, I know (I feel yo' pain, man), but hell, wasn't it Infidel2000 who said that broadband was the only way to go?

Oh, and I believe it's Calvin Klein who makes a bikini that says "Ho" in bright rhinestones.

Ok, you want to hear another weird dream?

Too bad, you're going to whether you like it or not.

So, the main part of this dream, the only part I remember clearly, involves Tommy Lee of Motley Crue. There was this chick there, and I made out with her a little bit because I got the feeling ole Tommy Lee would like that. As I recall, he did.

Why am I sharing this? ....

I was browsing around, checking out piercing and tattoo sites in an effort to be more informed and the like. Much of this has to relate to an earlier post. I'm sure you can find it for yourself.

Anyway, I found this in my surfing, and it occurred to me - if I were a guy, I think I'd like that booty. I could deal with that.

And then, I realized, that's a really odd thing to think, totally randomly, at 2 in the morning.

Then I remembered, I'm me, I'm a little on the loony side. So it's ok.

In other news, I don't have to pick up my niece today (Wednesday)! Yahoo.

No, not that Yahoo. The other one.

Tuesday, August 13, 2002
I think I'm coming down with something. Ugh.

I did not have a dream with Peter Wingfield last night, at least as I recall. Sad.

Oh, shit, the microwave is done. Oh well. I'm not terribly hungry anyway. I think I'll blame the shared frosting, which is my fault. No worries.

Ooo! J.K. Simmons as Skoda! With a mustache! Sweet!


Ok, dinner was tasty enough, I suppose. I'm a little lackluster today. I know! I'll blame it on a lack of Peter Wingfield!

I need the Methos Highlander episodes, stat.

From the Penny Arcade forums:

Johnny take a walk with your sister the moon
Let her pale light in to fill up your room
You've been living underground
Eating from a can
You've been running away
From what you don't understand

She's slippy
You're sliding down
She'll be there when you hit the ground

It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
She moves in mysterious ways
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
She moves in mysterious ways

Johnny take a dive with your sister in the rain
Let her talk about the things you can't explain
To touch is to heal
To hurt is to steal
If you want to kiss the sky
Better learn how to kneel

She's the wave
She turns the tide
She sees the man inside the child

It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
She moves in mysterious ways
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
She moves in mysterious ways
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
Lift my days, light up my nights

One day you will look...back
And you'll see...where
You were
By this love...while
You could stand...there
You could move on this moment
Follow this feeling

It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
She moves in mysterious ways
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright
She moves in mysterious ways
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright

We move through miracle days
Spirit moves in mysterious ways
She moves with it
She moves with it
Lift my days, light up my nights
I have always liked that song, dammit.

Now it is time for bed.

Monday, August 12, 2002
I TOTALLY forgot to mention earlier: I had a dream.

I had a dream where I made out with Peter Wingfield.

And no, girlies, sadly, he wasn't single - the wife (faceless as she was), was in the next room.

And I had a couple other guys, too.

It may have been just a dream, but kids, when you have a dream where you get to kiss Peter Wingfield, and he likes it, life is pretty goddamn good.

I've got to go have a lie-down. Excuse me.
Maybe I'll have some pie...

Sunday, August 11, 2002
Don't forget the Cliff Game, ok, kids?

I just had an incredibly good dinner. Salmon, rice, and string beans. This was followed by a tiny chocolate cake. I still have some of the chocolate truffles left, so there are still treasures awaiting. Yay!

I've been pondering, on and off, about getting one of them ear-piercings that goes up near the cartilage near the top of the ear. Or possibly a second set of piercings. But then I remember, I rarely wear earrings. Perhaps I would if I got a change, I dunno. Go me and laziness!

That, and it stings like a bitch.

Gaskell's ROCKED.

I got to dance with Happy Swearing Guy (aka Greg), and that was fun, although he is very tall and thus makes very large strides, which is bad in a very crowded room. Yay!

Reminder - don't dance with oldold men. Not good.

Ok, I have gots to get me something to eat.

Friday, August 09, 2002
So my sister bought the Lord of the Rings DVD. We watched it, and oohed and aaahed. It was really neat. I'm reallyreallyreally glad my sister liked the movie, because it gives me something geeky I can connect with her over.

And yes, that's a grammatically incorrect sentence.

Methinks I shall go and eat some baguette+Alouette. Toodles!

This is quite possibly one of the most perplexing things I've ever seen.

Thursday, August 08, 2002
The Cliff Game sounds rather intruiging. So, you know what? We're gonna start this.

Your first three are:
Brad Pitt, Ian McKellan, and Tom Selleck (I like boys)
Carrie-Anne Moss, Margaret Cho, and Liz Hurley (I like girls)

Ok then! Rules are, you choose one to sleep with, one to live with, and one to toss off of a cliff. Each action gets only one choice, and each person gets only one action. No loving-and-leaving-them-hanging-on-the-edge-of-the-White-Cliffs-of-Dover schemes.

Right then.

From CriminyPete.Com - Signs: It just bothers me that people have to 'lose their faith' after having some awful crap happen to themselves, and they can't just look around and say "Wait a minute... why in the world am I following the word of a god whose grand plan for humanity includes child rape? Could it be that this is all bullshit? Let me read this Bible again... holy crap! This Old Testament makes God look like a bipolar nutjob, giving tactical advice in wars to whatever handful of humans he considers 'the chosen people' at any given time, making up ridiculous commandments and ordering the slaughter of children... and this New Testament details the birth of Catholicism as being the work of Paul completely bastardizing the actual substance of Jesus' selfless anarchic ideas into an oppressive organizational hierarchy based on ill-defined metaphysical doctrine1! This is ridiculous! What bigger sign do I need to discount this bunk than hundreds and hundreds of "Men of God" raping children?"

Wednesday, August 07, 2002
I have updated the front page, so you may enjoy its splendor. Yay!

The links page is also sliiiiightly updated. I added Buttercup Festival, Rachel, and Smeagol links.

That is all, thank you.

Van Morrison's, like, Irish.

I think that's kinda funny.

I don't remember if I've mentioned it here, and I'm too tired to look, but I started in a new rpg - Liberty Fleet. It's run (so far as I recall) by a guy from the rpg I've been in the longest. Yay!

Go on, go to the site. I'm on there. Try to guess which character is mine. I dare you.

I remember when I had a huge ole crush on a guy in high school - Russ. He was cute, smart, and... yeah. He was an ass to me. I wonder how he's doing. Russ, if you're out there, I hope you've managed to tone down that jerk streak, as it's cute and all but will get you smacked. As for the Homer whoop-whoop on that Roman Slave Day, well, that was a silly ooops.

Good lord, I ought to get to bed.

Tuesday, August 06, 2002
Wil Wheaton, Russ of UE, and
Robby the Mat got to meet.

Those lucky bitches. BITCHES.

I'm hungry. Grrr.

Ok, so maybe that whole YAACS-commenting-system thing is bad, as it will be "majorly upgrading" the servers or whatever until 1am eastern time. Stupid thing.

But I've got cereal!

It kills me that The Commish is the badass on The Shield. It's like, Hey, you're The Commish! Stop trying to be mean!

In the meantime, I apologize for something that is not entirely my fault; namely, the absence of a commenting system. Bitches, all of them!

Monday, August 05, 2002
I've discovered that goat cheese (chevre to you Frenchies) is tasty. Yum.

I've also discovered that Taco Bell for brunch is a bad idea. Bad.

This whole Buffy-on-DVD thing is fun. Mwuahahahahahahahahahaha...

Sunday, August 04, 2002
Every time I watch a DVD on my computer, it fucks up the cursor something awful. It turns into a snowed square, whitish on top and greenish on the bottom. It's demented.

Then again, it's no big problem. Just irritating, s'all.

My tummy hurts. If you'll excuse me.

Every time I watch a DVD on my computer, it fucks up the cursor something awful. It turns into a snowed square, whitish on top and greenish on the bottom. It's demented.

Then again, it's no big problem. Just irritating, s'all.

My tummy hurts. If you'll excuse me.

Saturday, August 03, 2002
July 17, 2002 - “Oh, I think that’s from all the sex.”

I wish I could remember what kind of wine it was, so I could warn you away from it. But I don't. It apparently went with the squab meat at Sentsovi in Saratoga.

It was crap. The gerwerstruminnerinnerwinner was better.

My mom got me the second season of Buffy on DVD. I'm still kinda tingly.

Ooooo, I forgot to brush my teeth. Excuse me.


I'm hungry. Dad needs to hurry over here, so we may go and consume... consumables.

Friday, August 02, 2002
Brewery makes beer fit for a pharaoh - just a little more proof that maybe Mom's onto something by drinking mainly Kirin Ichiban.

Thursday, August 01, 2002
My brother really enjoyed his mud pie. I must admit, it turned out well, despite the slightly-too-thick crust.

He didn't get the Diesel Sweeties comic I printed out for him, though. It was this one.

Honestly, he ought to have gotten it. Ditto for my sister and my brother's cool girlfriend.

But noooooooo.

Eeeew, Legends of the Fall.

I'd completely forgotten how utterly shitty the opening music is for Ladyhawke.

First Knight: Whatever happened to Julia Ormond? She out-acted Richard Gere. Granted, that's not hard, but still. It's a shitty movie, but it's free.

Damn Kit-Kat ad. Now I'm hungry.

I'm making a mud pie for my bro's birthday tomorrow/today. I'm kind of sad I'm going to have to share it; I like pie.

A lot.

Holy shit! Ladyhawke's on next. Now I'll have to stay up. Damn TNT, luring me in with their Law&Order reruns, their shitty movies, their not-so-shitty movies...

Oh - another reason to watch First Knight - Valentine Pelka.

I'll update the front page soon.